i dig the boobs but.....

Sunday, September 24, 2006
okay so it's apparently the first day of my hormone fest. i mean really is it SERIOUSLY necessary to be all emotional just because your body is out of whack. i have this love hate thing with being a girl because of it. i mean really the boobs are great. they make my clothes fit correctly, they distract boys, and let's face it they are fun to play with. but what they don't tell you when you get your set of breasts is oh yeah well at least once a month you'll pay dearly for the rest of the time you get a respite. so here's the crappy time for me even though i did get to skate longer than normal. it probably wouldn't matter but all these things have been on tv today that had be sobbing damn near. i'm not depressed they were just really sweet stories and my normal aww that's nice response have been overridden by girly mode.

the first thing was a sister helping to give her sister a home on this show called hometeam. i rarely watch it. the stories are nice but i like extreme makeover home edition better. tonight the featured the ROGERS family whose home transformation just has to be SEEN. i was crying throughout the show. the family and their bond was one thing but getting folks from all over alaska to come help build on top of the community they live in nominating them for all of this was just too much for my adle brain. yeah i know i'm copping out in saying that i only let my guard down this way when i'm hormonal but it's true. if i let my brain and body experience all the crap that effects me on a daily basis i'd be a royal hot mess. since i like to be functional most of the time i try to skip that.

but i have to admit that it made me miss Him in a good way. i want to start my family now. i want to come home to a place that is filled with love and that the stress of my day can't matter because my time with my family is just beginning. living alone definitely has its perks. i desperately miss being able to come home and just get naked starting at the front door but i miss voices and action and a small bit of chaos too. my mother is here but a whirlwind of activity she is not. while i would never envy anyone the situation the rogers were living in i can most definitely say i envy the boundless love they displayed for one another and the sheer appreciation for life they had. so yes i still miss my Roaming Soldier but it's the kind that makes me smile right now.

okay enough before i get sappy again
love ya red

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