Inifinte Breakdowns: Week Eight Recap

 

I am desperately ready for a break in all the things I have to think about on a regular basis.  I’m not sure that will happen before we move but it will happen.  We’ll unpack slowly and we’ll restart our lives in the next wave.  I want to relax.  I want to be embraced.  I want to be babied a little if I’m being honest.  What I don’t want to have to do is think.  This last week of posts had me thinking and reacting more than I wanted and less than I wanted at the same time.  I knew these things about myself but it was still frustrating to revisit a bit at the time.  I love submission.  I love being submissive.  I love submitting to the right partner.  As I’ve moved through this journey I’ve learned more and more that I’ve done so much wrong that has resulted in these relationships not ending up where I wanted them to be.  That’s frustrating too but I need to let that go to bring space to the person that wants to be with me and can provide my needs in exchange for me serving them.  I’ll keep writing and working and I’ll see what life looks like on the other side of this.

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