Digital me is still getting lucky

So digital me is happy again because things with her Dominant partner of choice worked themselves out even if she’s topping from the bottom a little and He’s not quite as violent as he promises he could be but hey it’s a fake story for people who aren’t all in on BDSM so we’ll see how that continues to flesh out.  While I don’t need an insanely wealthy Dominant partner, not saying I’d turn one down just not that I need one, I would love some of the equipment he had available at the party he took her too.  Not sure what I’d do with it right now because I’m good and single but a spanking bench and spreader bar make me happy.  Ahh well, maybe one day.

Prompt for the day: Does being in love with your Dominant change the dynamic?  I think the best answer is it depends on the dynamic.  With Emperor and the Dutchman I think it may have changed the dynamic a bit.  Not because they were no receptive to it but because it wasn’t reciprocated.  Actually, let me be more clear.  With Emperor it was not only not reciprocated but it was almost devalued.  I wasn’t his ideal submissive.  I was just a willing submissive who was available and enamored of him.  I was the one providing gifts and tokens of my affection.  He did give me some lovely bruises but then I’d crash because the comfort and care I was wanting was not present.  With the Dutchman, I am not entirely sure how it impacted things.  I just felt like the more I emotionally invested the more we had problems communicating–largely because that meant more to me then and he had a ton going on in his personal life.  With RS,GN and Mr. Wolf I think it made things more comfortable and deepened the commitment because they were overtly emotionally invested in me as well.  It gave me a feeling of security and allowed me to go deeper in my submission I think. I mean it didn’t make any of the dynamics last so there’s that.  Ideally, I’d like a relationship in which I could share that level of emotional commitment with my partner and it not hamper things. 

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