weekly post #10

Sunday, July 03, 2022

Prompt for today: Do you have a meditation ritual related to your submission? What is it like?  I do not.  I honestly probably need one for daily life but meditation is difficult for me on a good day.  On bad days when I really should be invested in it, it's impossible.

Prompt for tomorrow: Do you have a submissive mantra? What is it, and how did you come to use it?  I do not have a submissive mantra either.  I'm not sure what that would look like if I'm being entirely honest.

Prompt for Tuesday: As a general rule, have you found acceptance to be easy or difficult? Is it beneficial to your dynamic?  I honestly did a weird face when this prompt hit my eyes initially.  I was wondering who exactly was supposed to be accepting me to respond to that.  My immediate family and friends don't know a thing about my submissive life.  I don't think they could rectify who I am to them with that version of me.  I'm sure it would be helpful to any relationship I was in to not have to splinter those parts of myself but that is my existence right now.

Prompt for Wednesday: What have you discovered in your service that you never expected?  That I enjoy kneeling.  I don't mean in a posed position cause let's be honest that shit can hurt after a while.  But I mentally enjoy not being in charge so letting myself lower into a submissive mindset is literally one of the most enjoyable things for me.  I get to step out of the dominant spaces I inhabit.  I get to be soft.  I get to be vulnerable.  Things I don't enjoy easily in my normal daily life.

Prompt for Thursday: shortened What is your submissive style, describe it and does this work for you and your partner.  How would you describe your partner's style?  Is it different when you play versus daily?  I am a non age playing little or baby girl primarily.  That is I want to be with a partner that is nurturing and protective with me.  It has worked to my knowledge with all but one of my partners and that was when I wasn't sure what I needed.  My partners are ones that like to take care of me but we have struggled with their definition of caring sometimes.  During play they become more sadistic and I become incredibly masochistic.  I have described myself as a pain slut in those moments and it is true.

Prompt for Friday: When are you most aware of being submissive?  Honestly, when I'm single because there's no outlet for the energy that is just sitting there untapped.

Prompt for Saturday: Are some tasks easier when you are turned on? Probably some sexual tasks but nothing is coming to mind immediately as oh yeah can totally do that more when I'm turned on.  Perhaps the pain tolerance increasing.


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